I find these days I’m a lot more at peace with my life. I feel like I have got a lot of my answers philosophically and spiritually. I feel I have lived. These days I’m just focused on staying well and avoiding triggers. I’m hopeful there is a heaven where I can meet my relatives.
I don’t believe in hell but I don’t rule it out.Though I have sometimes speculated this reality could be hell. I also wonder if heaven is the same for everyone or if it is different for each of us with connections.
I was a child with lots of questions that continued into adulthood. Depression and my dehumanised experience for not being able to work led to many more questions. It led to a lot of mental pain. So finding my answers in Philosophy and Spirituality was a long difficult journey.
Like many children I was born into this world with it drummed into me that I must get an education to get a job. I never really questioned what that was all about. I approached it like a fanatic. I got a good education and IT jobs.I had everything I wanted yet depression came.
The way I can explain my progress from this is like peeling the layers of an onion from the inside out. I was exposed to new philosophical ideas (therapy – ways of thinking) that made my mental state less stable. I kept questioning, an autistic trait which has took me years.
The journey of our species can also be described as peeling the layers of an onion from inside out. New ideas are built upon until they fall to the wayside. Our planet Earth is perhaps that onion and by the time we are finished with it, we will need a new one to start fresh with.