The last decade I have lived on my own with the exception of 6 months with my ex-bf. Its felt like being in a space capsule with away missions. Over time I have consumed a library on the internet of the greatest thinkers, music, film, art, history, science and still not done yet.
I’m not sure anyone including myself is supposed to live such a solidary life. Though my own make-up and the circumstances I found myself in contribute it. I think the consequences of such isolation mean I become close to unreachable. My space capsule left orbit long ago.
In the end my exclusion meant I have spent a lot of time trying to find the meaning for it, my meaning and the meaning of human life itself.A diagnosis was not good enough for me.I’ve got a good overview.I think now it’s spending the rest of my life looking at interesting detail.