A Fearful Future

As an #ActuallyAutistic adult I feel fearful of the future.Particularly as I am structurally unemployed from not being effective affective labour.I am less capable at modifying neurotypical emotional experiences.Every year our society becomes more capitalist and market dominated.

At present although I don’t thrive I do survive on a social safety net. Some autistics are less fortunate.Some are less able to look after themselves and need carers. There are others deemed to be high functioning but get less support than me. Most of my support is financial.

When I hear of ministers wanting to privatise the NHS and attack people on benefits I wonder what place is there for people like me. Issues like mine can’t be solved in a debate in parliament or on Twitter. They are complex issues that require a holistic analysis and intervention.

Autism isn’t something that can be solved. It requires some healing in society to accept difference. Institutions need rearchitecting. We need equity and personalised support. We need mainstream social engineering in the public interest. We need social innovation.

I think it’s doubtful we will see a new enlightenment on the actualisation of people. People have been atomised where individual responsibility is paramount and social responsibility doesn’t matter. I am resigned I may face more intense persecution one day.

Many people recognise the cross as a symbol of Christianity found on Churches. Those with a more deeper understanding would know it represents the cross Jesus Christ was crucified on. It is believed Jesus died for our sins and as an individual was persecuted for his beliefs.

As a Christian I take solace in the cross and what it represents. Jesus’ enemies thought that by killing him everything he stood for such as loving your neighbour would go away. His martyrdom did the opposite and so we still live with his memory today.

By staying alive and talking about myself I feel I’m continuing his work.I hope I don’t become homeless again, without a home or place of safety to go to.Personally I would rather be crucified than die cold outside. As I don’t know any way we wake people up to this social apathy.

However I find the smartest people in power know they can’t have martyrs.That’s what makes the invisible hand of the market so effective. It pushes people to suicide and homelessness without anyone being responsible. To me it’s just a giant global game of poker.The losers suffer.

I hope my worse fears aren’t realised. That humanity works out how to resolve it’s complex social problems. Though I think the prospect of a dark age is real. Not of technology but one of human purpose. I believe we are more than electrochemical machines designed to build wealth.