Why Does My Care Fail?

Why does my care fail? If you follow me you are probably aware I have been sectioned and hospitalised many times. Fundamentally I would say it’s our Neoliberal and market fundamentalist culture which is the root cause. Though I’ll avoid an overtly philosophical discussion.

The principal issue for a lot of my hospitalisations initially were stress from undiagnosed autism and depression.I couldn’t cope with a full time job yet the whip get being applied. I had numerous suicide attempts but tried many medications including ECT.

The result of stopping work reduced my stress but I then went through a process of self pity and isolation fuelling more depression. By that point I was heavily dependent on multiple medications with all kinds of side effects that needed changing.

I feel the medications and ECT have done long term harm. Once my Mum & Stepdad died. I had no one to watch out for me and was alone. The pandemic made things worse where I would act bizarre. Members of the public calling ambulance/police made me more bizarre and feel unsafe.

If I had an assigned professional I could see whenever I need to and supported me regularly it would have been different. I could build a relationship with them.If the police deferred to the professional, who took proper responsibility then I wouldn’t need to be sectioned.

Once I’m in hospital the assumption is the medication failed. The Doctor picks a new medication and then I am kicked out to deal with new side effects alone again. I have had a care coordinator in the past but they weren’t supportive and inflexible with appointments.

If someone called the Ambulance/police for a mental health concern. It became their problem not the care coordinators. They don’t know what their dealing with so I’m sectioned. The Dr/Locum in the hospital doesn’t know me and is probably overwhelmed by the size of my records.

So to the police/ambulance I am bizarre. To the mental health professionals I am just a diagnosis of Autism and/or Schitzoaffective disorder. They can’t make sense of me. I’m detained, medicated and kicked out again. That’s my life. This is how the system works – wasting £.

Just to close that I have been on over a dozen different psychiatric medications since 2010. A new one can change me and I have to get to know the new me almost like Doctor Who regenerating.

Finally. They change the hospital psychiatrists regularly. When I was in hospital for 4.5 months. One left after 6 weeks and was replaced with a different one. I rarely meet the same psychiatrist in hospital.

Note: I’ve never smoked or took drugs. I don’t drink alcohol. I grew up from a working class single parent family.